Your mother-in-law has never liked you very much, so when she comes over and says she “wants to get to know you better,” you are instantly suspicious. You are convinced that that isn’t at all what she wants, and you decide to play detective and find out what is going on. The first things you notice are that she has an odd cut on her arm and that she is carrying a rubber chicken that is missing a foot (750 words or fewer).
***
I was shocked when I got the text message:
Let’s talk.
It was mostly because Denise didn’t know how to work email let alone a text message. But I guess my wife had shown her recently. Denise is my wife’s mother. She hates me. It all began when I started dating her daughter. Denise’s husband died about eight years back, and she thought that by me dating her daughter I was taking away the last bit of family that she had. She never knew that my intentions were not that at all. I was hoping to simply be another helping hand in her life. But it seemed like everything I did never amounted to much in her eyes.
That made this particular text message all the more ominous.
***
“Please, have a seat.” I directed her to her favorite chair next to the fireplace.
She sat down very slowly, looking around as though a fly were on the walls, dodging her gaze. I thought nothing of it and sat down on the couch across from her.
“So, you wanted to talk?” I asked.
“Yes” she started, “I was hoping to get to know you better.”
I shifted uneasily in my seat. This can’t be good, I thought, is she looking for more dirt on me to manipulate? “Ok,” I hesitated, “where should we begin?”
“What’s your diet like?” She said, tilting her head to the side and sitting straighter than before with her legs crossed.
“I guess it’s pretty good. Your daughter is a fabulous cook, and she only uses organic stuff. And we never eat fast-food, really, so...”
“Good, good.” She interjected, nodding her head. She started rubbing her scratch softly with her fingertips.
“What happened to your arm?” I asked. She quickly withdrew her hand and began playing with her hair.
“Nothing serious; a tree branch snagged me on my way out this evening. So, tell me about your family, any major medical problems?”
I repositioned myself, crossing my arms out of frustration. “I’m sorry,” I said apprehensively, “But what is the importance of this?”
She sank in her chair. She looked as though someone had forced her to haul a full sized piano up a flight of stairs. I felt awful for her.
“It’s just that,” she began, “my husband was taken from me far earlier than he should have been. And I just want to make sure that you’re taking every precaution to not let that happen to my little girl.” Her eyes turned red as tears welled up. “I can’t watch my little girl go through what I had to go through.” She was nearly convulsing in sobs.
I nervously got out of my seat and quietly walked over to her. When I got to her she had her face in her hands and was shaking nearly uncontrollably. I put my hand on her shoulder. “I’m sorry that you’ve had to go through this.” She stopped sobbing. “I can’t even begin to imagine what you’ve been dealing with.” She lifted her face from her hands. “And I give you my word that I wo—“
When her eyes met mine I froze.
It wasn’t Denise.
Her eyes were full of red blood vessels, almost to the point of being completely filled. A grin peeled across her face.
“Denise…” I backed away, as slowly as possible. She was now in a full grin and rising from her seat, advancing toward me like a cat stalking a mouse.
“Denise. What’s wrong with you?”
A growl burped from deep within her throat.
It happened so quickly, I’m not sure how I managed to get away. She lunged at me with an unbearable scream and her teeth bared. I dove to the side behind the couch as she stumbled to her hands and feet.
I turned to get up and sprinted for the door. All I needed to do was get outside and then I would at least have a chance. She was way too quick for me to be inside.
I’d reached the door and ripped it open as she made another attempt at me. I slammed it close and heard the thud, then ran into the woods. I was in my element now.
The hunt was on.
